Ever try to start a twitter hashtag and just utterly fail? In light of the Higgs Boson news I thought #NewParticleNamedAfterObama would be funny. Obviously combining physics and politics is a bad idea. No one wanted to play.
A particle walks into a bar. The bartender says, "hey, we don't serve electrons in here. Are you an electron?"
The particle says, "no. I'm proton."
The bartender asks, "are you sure?"
The proton says, "I'm positive."
The Higgs Boson walks into a Catholic church. The priest asks the particle, "can I help you?"
The Higgs Boson says, "no. But I'm here to help you."
The priest asks, "how's that?"
The Higgs Boson replies, "you can't have mass without me."